Sunday, October 26, 2014

how i feel

There will be no pretty pictures in this posy just plain emotion so if you want to pass you will not insult me.

I am sitting here remembering being 6 months pregnant and imagining how and what my child will be.  Will she (I was pretty sure I was having a girl) be healthy, happy what color hair will she have ( red by the way ) and what kind of mother will I be.

Fast forward 21 + years and now I am thinking have I done what I should have.  We just got back from moving her for the fourth time.  The first time for college.  The second time when she started her dream job and needed to be closer because she doesn't yet drive.  The third because she got laid off and needed to come back home.  But this time is so very different.

Before there was still a need for our involvement.  Take her shopping, to the Laundromat, and help with the little issues that came up.  This the she is not alone.  She has chosen to start a life with her boyfriend.  He will be transporting her.  He will be doing the little things that need to be fixed around the apartment.  They will be taking care of each other.  While I am excited for them I am a little sad.

I do define myself as a good mother although some will say I spoil my kids.  I have been the one that has made sure she ate healthy, took her meds,  helped her in times of struggle.  Have I given her enough information?  Have I prepared her to be a good partner? Will she still come to me for advise?  I know she is ready to be out but still this is so bittersweet.

Hugs
KK

7 comments:

  1. I know it, stay calm,she will be fine ..... thanks for sharing your feelings *big cyber hug* R

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  2. Oh, I have been there...almost 20 years ago. I did a good job of raising her, as you most likely did too. You are out of control now. Stay calm. If she needs you, she'll let you know or you will sense it.

    Mine came back home two more times. The last time we told her was the last time. They can make it on their own, as long as you are there when needed, like YOUR mom probably was for you.

    I'm pretty sure what you are feeling is totally normal. Best Wishes.

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  3. Don't worry, it sounds like you've done everything right .
    It is all a part of life. We have all had to learn to be independent, but it was always a comforting feeling to know that our dear, beloved mom was there if we needed advice or even a shoulder to cry on.
    Throughout nature the little chicks test their wings and then fly away, eventually they'll settle down and build their own nests.

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  4. You have taught her well and she will be just fine. But I do know how you feel. Each time one of my three kids fly the coop I wonder what I forgot to teach them.

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  5. Hi Kristen,
    All will be fine. We have our children and raise them to the best of our ability, with the hope that at least some of what we taught sank in and stuck. You are a wonderful loving and caring Mother, that just want her children to be the best they can be. It is just time for your daughter to enter into the next chapter of her life. She will always need you, because you are her Mom.
    Big Hug
    Therese

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  6. I know cohabitation is the trendy thing to do. In these troubled times some things never change. No marriage vows then for sure more anguish and heart ache.
    God knows better not you. Be strong in your belief. In the end it's all your really have. We are all the problem trying to fix the problem. Good to you.

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  7. Hi Kristen, It is always hard letting go. Even though she has found a partner she will still need her Mom at times. I believe that you have taught her well and she will do well on her journey through life.

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